Aaron’s Birth Story
12/2/06
By Lynn Rodriquez
Aaron’s birth story begins at the beach at Fort Clinch State Park. My mom and dad in-law were here awaiting Aaron’s arrival and I went to the beach with them. It was a wet, cold, drizzly day and Pete, my father in-law and I were fishing, or drowning shrimp as he called it, from the beach. Beth, my mom in-law had just come back from her walk along the beach and while I was sitting on the bench with her we saw dolphins in the ocean. She smiled and said that is a good sign. Anxiously and nervously I would feel just the slightest twinge and I so hoped that it was the beginning of labor. Bob, also my father in-law would miss the birth of his first grandchild, as he had just flown back to New York. The baby was due November 29, my sister in-law’s birthday, but here it was December 1, 2006.
As we headed back for the car I occasionally felt just a twinge more than I had the entire labor and I just kept hoping. We stopped at the bathrooms to clean up and when I came out Beth and Pete were talking to a family with little ones. They insisted that I look at the baby so that I would get good baby vibes. Not much later we were heading to the interstate and I decided to time these mini contractions. They weren’t consistent and averaged about 20 minutes apart. As we came closer to the interstate we realized there was an accident ahead of us. We were only minutes from the interstate in normal traffic but it took about an hour for us to get there. The contractions became a little harder, nothing terrible by any means, but they were so much more noticeable and we all had a happy, giddy kind of laugh about us as we chatted on the way home.
While on the way home, Carlos, my wonderful husband called to check on us. Very excitedly I told him how I was feeling and we made plans to go for a walk. Due to the weather, we decided to go to the grocery store and walk around there, that way we could pick any last minute items we needed since we were expecting to be around the house the next few days with our newborn baby. Walking around the store I realized I was in early labor. It would be a long night, and we were both so excited. A few contractions stopped me dead in my tracks and I hugged my belly. But, mostly, they were just felt like cramping stomach knots. We began timing them and they were consistent, about 20 minutes apart.
When we arrived home, we ate dinner and talked with Beth and Pete for a little while. I called my parents and gave them the news. Louise, my mom, wanted to come over for the birth, it was a planned homebirth, but suddenly I felt claustrophobic and didn’t want too many people around. I felt like I would be putting on a show, if my parents and my son (Michael) were also over. So, I asked my mom to please bring Michael over but not to stay. I can’t say she understood, I also asked her to not be in the hospital room when Michael was born, but she complied. Michael said he was concerned about the baby and me since it would be a homebirth, and wanted to be near me. I felt that it would be good for him to see, especially since he was 14 years old at the time.
Beth suggested that Carlos and I get some rest. She said she would do the same. And of course, with her being a midwife we decided to listen to her. Before we went to bed we called our mid-wife and told her we would call her in the morning, unless things moved along faster than we expected. We slept for a few hours and woke to my contractions being much harder and closer together. Carlos woke Beth up and she and Carlos never left my side after that. Beth helped me with my breathing and showed me how to breathe through the contractions and make good noises that helped so much. Carlos held my hand and rubbed my hair and Beth rubbed my legs. My water broke, I wasn’t quite sure what it was for a while, it was like a pop in my groin area that wasn’t exactly painful, but scared me somewhat. Afterwards I kept dripping water. Beth called my midwife to let her know my water broke. The contractions were so much harder at this point and I remember being in the bathroom and feeling that I couldn’t endure anything any harder than I already was. Beth got me to look at her, and there was something about looking in her eyes and her telling me that I would get through this birth, that calmed me a little and helped me endure longer. I began asking to labor in the birthing tub Beth had brought for me, so she and Carlos were working on filling that in our bedroom.
Soon the tub was full and I was having moments where I wondered if I could endure pain any worse than I was already having. I begged to get in the tub and Beth thought it would be okay, although I felt she would rather me wait for my midwife to get to our house. I got in the tub and it felt so good, but it all seemed so real, being in the tub, as if I was able to keep reality out of my mind before going in there. I had a contraction and it seemed to be just a little easier being in the tub. The contractions were coming much closer together now, every few minutes, and were so hard to get through, but as I focused on each one, I did get through them, with many thanks to my support, Beth and Carlos. The next contraction came just a couple of minutes later and with it was a sound I had never heard before. For a moment I shocked myself, then embarrassingly I looked and Beth and said, “I think I have to go to the bathroom.” She calmly replied, “No, you’re having a baby.” I could tell she was a little nervous and she asked if I would get out of the tub until my midwife arrived. I was out a couple of contractions later and back on our bed.
Beth asked if she could check me, and I already knew it wouldn’t bother me, I wanted her to be able to catch her grandchild, so I felt checking me was no more private than that. She announced that I was about six centimeters, but by the look on her face, I couldn’t tell if she was lying or not. She felt the need to get the room prepared for my midwives, who were on their way. After having all the birthing supplies organized and ready she busied herself lighting candles and found one that my Sam, my sister in-law had given us, so she lit that one for Sam, in her absence.
When the first midwife arrived the contractions were much closer together, with only enough time to take a couple of breaths in-between. I felt as though I could keep going with the contractions since pushing seemed to be easier than having the contractions without the pushing sensation. But I didn’t know how long I could keep myself together, I had to keep telling myself, just to get through the next contraction. I tried really hard not to look at the big picture and think about all the time I had endured, but just to focus on the contraction I was having at the time. The thoughts still crept into my head though, that if it lasts for hours longer or if the pain gets any worse, I just won’t be able to succeed, not that I had a choice at that point. I certainly couldn’t run away. But, with each contraction, the pain didn’t increase, and it was still easier pushing then before, when I wasn’t, so I kept reminding myself of that.
My midwife arrived and checked me. She said that I was fully dilated but that something was keeping me from being able to push the baby out. She asked if I wanted her to help me have the baby by moving that part (I can’t remember the name of it). I didn’t want her to, as I had read birth stories about the pain being severe, and I felt I couldn’t deal with any added pain. Beth said she would like for me to try exhale pushing. Carlos and I must have given her a weird look because she nodded and explained that we probably were taught in Bradley class not to exhale push but that she felt in our circumstance it would work. We pushed really hard on “three”, and when there was a hurting sensation I let go instead of pushing through it. Soon I heard someone say that the baby has dark hair and again, a moment where I felt surreal, realizing that the baby was really coming.
Beth had me touch my baby’s head. That was the most incredible feeling I had ever felt before, to be able to touch my baby while he was still inside of me. Soon, Beth had Carlos position his hands so that the baby passed through his hands first as she caught him. The sensation of him being born was the most empowering moment of my life. He was placed on my chest and the feelings came soaring in; relief that labor was over, love for this baby that I had been loving but was only just able to meet and love for Carlos for giving him to me and for Beth for helping me have the most wonderful birth I can ever imagine, and to my midwives for listening to me whine that my back hurt and still cheering me on. Beth, emotional and crying, ran into Michael’s room and woke him up, letting him know that he has a brother and to come meet him and getting Pete to come meet his grandson. I didn’t want to take my eyes off of Aaron, and I so didn’t want this to be a dream. It was absolutely the best day of my life because I felt that I could do anything, and I was so glad that I persevered and had an un-medicated birth, for me and for my child.